Auto drivers demand
corporation officials have no moral

Why we need more condoms
and what is the meaning of life?

Dictionary says - The existence of an individual human being or animal.
The condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity and continual change preceding death.

As you observe the overcrowded buses, it makes one wonder is there too much of life on earth.

Why is the obsession with the thought "i need a heir to my wealth"
Can't you just adopt a child and be done with it. Are we so blind that we are not able to see the frightening scenario that is enveloping us. Water crisis, land crisis, food crisis and a lot more.

If the thought "I need a legal heir" exists then why do the really poor have babies? is it because they need to share their misery? Or is it the thought that their offspring is going to be somebody someday and it will help them get out of their misery? Is that why they have more the one child?

In which case the rich don't need babies? But still why do they insist on having them? Because they also want to share their success with the close ones. In which case are they greedy and selfish?

Why cannot largesse distributed evenly. Why does a small family of 5 require 27 floors, 600 staff, 3 helipads, 6 floors for parking? Its obscenity. Contrasting that with another very rich man who never married and lives in a flat that is crowded with books and dogs.
How much money does one require? Is there a parameter. Can the government put a value for each individual and pass a law that you can earn only so much in a year? That was the beginning of communism. But greed got better of the system. How many Gandhians do we require?

The total money in India is around 3 trillion rupees. Total population of India is 1, 027, 015, 247 (Males - 531, 277, 078, females 495, 738, 169). So if we were to divide 3 trillion equally to this population. 3 trillion has twelve zeros. so that is 3,00,00,00,00,00,00 which when divided by 1, 027, 015, 247 would be a very small amount. I don't know if my comp was giving me the right answer. But you cannot a do a shit with that money. All you can do is have a single beetle leaf without beetle nut and that to, only once a month. Maybe that's why communism failed.

But still we can have equality to a certain degree. Don't ask me how. Maybe we bring the ratio down. Money versus people. We need more Condoms.

hi

My cough is asking for an encore. Ok that's a sick joke. I have been coughing for over two weeks now. And i am really sick of it. My gut is threatening to come outside. I have have managed to console it with some benedyril. This cough of mine (being very possesive now) has the habit of appearing at the most inappropriate times. Like when you are trying to impress a girl and all your sweet nothings are swallowed by him. TSK TSK. I feel i can really run fast now. I have good cough muscles. (very sad joke). Actually coughing is a method to warn someone that they are saying something inappropriate. So what happens when you cough genuinely and not intent to when someone is saying the right thing. Paradox. I like paradoxes. When you ask a liar if he is a liar and he says yes - then that's a paradox.You should never cough during a western classical concert. But you cough up enough to go and listen to it. BAH. Hypocrites. So when will it all end? And when will i say something without coughing?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The cochin plot

What the trip was all about....

...and what liz thought about it.....



...Sajan was not waiting for Liz's approval....



...and Ram had other plans...



....and Tunu was interested only on her own Jenga....



....and skinny says "he da original Jenga....




...and tess reiterates why we are doing this trip...



....and she was on a different mission, hoping cochin would answer her quest for....



...but there was no help from
non-malayalam speaking mallus...


....Does that deter Arwa?...



...and she thought this was Madhavan from YUYA...


..."why don't you go behind Madhavan instead"...


...Hey I'm not Madhavan...I'm Kothandaraman...


...Come I'll take you to Madhavan...


....and the news spread. They all came to see Madhavan...


..."I dont like women" - Madhavan...



...they were shooting for sports illustrated
with Naomi Campbell...



...How will Bugs Bunny get Madhavan ya?...
what is the plot ya?...




...There were many plots for sale...


...why are they following me?...



...coz we love you Madhavan...




meanwhile...if its more than four words,
i cant play this game...



...The answer was just behind them...



...Is it a dog?...


...its good to be Madavan's friend...



...finally found my nose double...


..the piped piper of Fort Kochi...


...oooh is that him?....




...THE MOSS...




...its just a substitute...



...blowing is just a figure of speech...ladies...



...Madhavan and piped piper show how its done...



...and this Naval Base, none of the boys were interested in...



..."Maachi inda story vellaikey avala,
Finish pannidalama?...

3 dirty men at 40 and who joined later

¬¬Three Dirty men at 40 and the one who joined later.




Where we went everyone knew nothing. Starting km reading - 24,569, closing km reading – 25875. Total distance travelled 1306 kms without knowing nothing. ‘Go straight’ to thiruthirapoondi. ???? There are 4 roads. ??? huh?




Bharath arrives at 6. Wearing a pinkish shirt and a rucksack. His Bullet (bike) all prim and proper. We take the customary photo before we start the trip. Chilly morning. Good feel. Empty road. Had breakfast at mamalla bhavan and headed for pondy. Before reaching pondy my back wheel starts to wobble. I paid close to 18 grand to get my bike ready. Hmph. Headed straight to promenade and ordered beer. OB. A word I would repeat very often. OB – ordered beer. He he. Met a man outside promenade riding a well-maintained Bullet (bright yellow colour). Told me where to go. Nice mechanic. Fixed my bike. Got a carrier fixed too. Tied up the rucksack. Bharath knew where to stay. Must have stayed there earlier. Hmmm… with whom? Went to Satsang. OB. Had very good food. Went back to hotel, watched IPL, slept well. Left Pondy late. Bharath’s fault. Very hot. Thanks to the coast we survived. Next destination – Kariakal. Another French colony. Reason for choosing French colonies – cheap liquor. A slight detour now. Pichavaram. Mangrove forest. Boating. Not interested. Not Interested???? Yes. Bharath noticed – “ pinnale parthingala”. I swerved. “BAR” Yeah you’re right. Boat ride is boring. OB. I should tell you that this bar had no counter, NO BARMEN, NO LUXURIOUS SEATING. One freezer. One man who served you what there was. Two seating places. One was occupied by 2 locals. The other, of course by 3 dirty men. 3 BO. Some chick peas and multi coloured vathals (crisps). Pradeep and bharath ordered for extra helpings of Chick peas. Pleasantly tanked we headed further south and reached kariakal quite late. Another Attempt of locating hotel. SIGH. (Nanda, Paris International, and some non-descript places we ended up at (ironically on the coromandel coast) Atlantic Inn. Decent place (with AC) but not good food support. OB. 6. Drank 4. Left 2 behind. Ordered chicken 65 (Pradeep likes it) and bharath had what? I don’t remember. An Old man in a lungi kept coming and going and kept bringing us beer and food. Watched IPL on a very grainy TV. Grains so large the white ball was missed most of the time. Crashed. Woke up Late. Bharath’s fault.

Yelagiri part 1

After 26 years of planning we decided to leave at 6.00 a.m. and promptly left at 7.30 a.m. Rubecon employees on the whole are all foodies. So i was not surprised that we discussed breakfast as soon as we all assembled (the reason to start late).
We ambled along in 3 cars - Bens Car (pronounced as 'Benz Car" which is an Opel), Swift Varghese, and a Japanese make that sethu brought along and which was touted to be fast. 14 of us in 3 different cars. Racing did not start because co-ordinating does not happen in Rubecon without food. First stop - highway motel after poonamalee. And concentration takes some time after food at rubecon, so I dont remember anything after breakfast till we reached Vaniyambadi. I was told we were picking that bangalore boy (Karthick) at the bus stop. After this racing started. We were lagging in our Opel (though Ben is a very good Driver).
Our delay was because Francis tried desperately to ask direction from a goat. He did not realise that mehaa means right, meh means left and tapping of the hind legs mean go straight. What confused Francis was the goat jumped straight up, tapped its hind legs and bleated mehaa-meh. That means 'U' turn. Anyway we sauntered along at 100 kmph and reached the foothills. In between a guy from the lorry ahead decided to spit paan on Francis.

Lucky we had the wind screen. the climb started. First stop. No guessing. The view of the town below from a high point. We behaved exactly like tourists. Climbed on rocks and took pictures. After 9 hairpin bends (in between the guy driving the japanese car tried to overtake us, not realising the South African has seen more wilder beasts than an outback Aussie chasing kangaroos) we reached the hotel (very originally named Hotel Hills) in about 5 and half minutes. Not a big hill huh? The Organiser cum public relations manager cum booze man cum ex shipee cum stud boy told us where to go. The unpacking began - 2 bottles of Rum, 2 bottles of Whiskey, Lots of cans of Beer and a few soft drinks (he does not believe in soft drinks as you see). The dilemma started - Now do we go sight seeing or just drink and get high and just halucinate. Then the Rubecon thing happened. Lets EAT first. We were ushered into a semi-lit dining hall. The chaps at the hotel must have had a feeling of welcoming Barbaric vikings who were at sea for 14 months and nothing good to eat. They were pretty aprehensive first about serving us. Lot of us had 2 plates each. In case it got over before the 2nd helping. (we are very very cautious about food). Ria was the only who was not greedy. We stuffed ourselves and then debated whether we were too full to walk even to the hotel gate let alone the lake.
After much thought, we said afterall this place has got 10 people and 3 goats - so the place cant be THAT big. Even if we rolled along we could finish sight seeing in 3 and half minutes. Thats too much work. Why tax yourself when on holiday. Thoo. Then suddenly The Millionaireness Serah Kurien of the Conoor Royal Family Sporting a very sporty dress announced "anyone wants to play TT" There was a fight between The Organiser cum public relations manager cum booze man cum ex shipee cum stud boy and Karthick for grabbing a racket. Since i was so full of food i only notice these important things. I dont know who won and who lost. We were all equally pathetic at Table Tennis. Skinny not wanting to exert too much energy decided to take on a very strong player like Ria at carroms. Ria being the baby had the entire board to herself. She had her own rules. She would use the striker wherever she wants and hit whichever coin she decides. This scheme of things suited skinny very well.
The focus shifted and Her highness decided to play badminton and rest of us slaves were handed down the TT rackets. Francis for some strange reason was absent. Our driver Ben decided that the G force from racing was too much decided to take a nap. Somebody then mentioned that there was a lake and we needed to see it. So everyone decided that TT and Badminton was passe and we walked along to the lake which was just a stone's throw away. As usual as per rubecon rules whenever we go out we normally go to eat, so the outbackee decided to buy mangoes with chilli powder. That took us about 25 mins. The largese was distributed to everyone present and by the time we walked another 25 meters, the aussie decided we need to refill again and we bought some guava with chilli powder and salt. it was yum. Ria led the way to the boat house. Your truly, Sneha, Anoopa and Nam reached there first. We waited for awhile and the rest the bunch took a long time coming so we decided to take a boat for ourselves, which did not go down very well with the rest of the BOYS. They then decided to become pirates and decided to chase us. It was chaos. 3 boats filled with rubeconites screaming on top of their voices shattered the lives of those 10 people and 3 goats. We returned back to getty completely exhausted and engaged ourselves in our favourite pastime - Egg omlettes and chai. he he. It was getting a bit dark, so we decided to head back to the hotel. The hotel people meanwhile had very sweetly organised a campfire.

Meanwhile the darling was missed sorely. Every girls lips had the mantra - 'where is Bharath ya'. Bharath was on his own mission. Please contact him for details.

The fire was lit in the middle of Millionaireness Serah Kurien of the Conoor's badminton court. The Aussie was trying to out do the south african. He was jumping around the fire doing the zulu traditional dance but to Desi beats. We do not know if he was drunk, But all and sundry had good fun. karthick was most of the time half naked. so he had to be very close to the fire. either next to the actual fire or next to his flame. Anyway he was warm. The table with eats was strategically place. very close to all of us. No one knows how much each one drank. But the spirits were pretty high, coz suddenly there was pole dance which erupted out of nowhere. Ram and sethu started and was in between interrupted by half naked karthick. All these going ons was making me sober by the minute. Sigh. Then group dance happened. Yelagiri had never seen a night like this. 10 people and 3 goats had a rough night.

twice in 2 days

I was going home from office one day as i suddenly developed this fever "i don't want to be in office today". I think someone was really really jealous that i was going home barely after i reached office, that they must have done some kind of that voodoo or black magic stuff and really cursed me. I was happily cruising at 16.2 mph, and since i hate the main roads i had taken my favourite shortcut - from ambattur estate you dive into potholes and get bumped occassionally by roads and by the time you reach avadi {thats 10 kms} your spine moves 10 nothches up at least 536 times. Now where was I? I  get carried away too quickly. Like when i was school {2 years ago} my mom asked me to go to the provision store next to our house and get some milk or some stuff like that. I marched off. went to the shop. the nadar was busy. so i sat on those gunny bags meant to store stuff to feed cows. I occassionally used to eat animal fodder and got a nickname "Kannukutti" which means "calf" in tamil. Since i used spend at least 4 hours of training every day, {i was an athlete} used to run the 400 meters {50.6 seconds, really fast} , i was very tired. I used get up at 3.55 a.m. every morning, eat one of those chick peas that my dad used to soak overnight, board the train at avadi and reach the medical college grounds around 6. If you arrive late you'll run alone and do twice the amount of workout. My coach Mr. Victor Wilson was a real task master. Now where was I?..........Yes i went to sleep on the Gunny bags. The nadar being a very nice man let me sleep and asked the other customers to place their orders softly lest they wake me up. My mother had completely forgotten that she had sent her son to the provision store, continued with her chores and fed the rest of the family. As she was about to lock the door she realised there was an empty pillow and realised that she had 3 children and not 2. It dawned on her that she had left her last darling lamb outside, and promptly came to the provision store to look for me. My mom aslo gets very distracted. Like when she was flying to Vienna, I saw her through the entrance. She was supposed to check-in and then come back and say bye to me. She only called me after she reached Vienna. I waited almost 3 hours at the entrance. LOL. My mother. excused. So when she came to the provision store she got carried away {not noticing me sleeping there} ordered for half a KG of potato, some tamarind, raw rice, lemon for lemon rice the next day, and  various assorted stuff for the household. I'm sure she must have looked at me sleeping on the gunny bag and must have thought, "which soulless mother has left her child at the provision store". And went back home. The point I'm trying to make here is....what?